diff --git a/cpanfile b/cpanfile
index 2e7c17d..e154fbd 100644
--- a/cpanfile
+++ b/cpanfile
@@ -28,6 +28,7 @@ requires 'Scalar::Util'; #Required by Data::Dumper
 requires 'BSD::Resource';
 requires 'File::Glob';
 requires 'POSIX';
+requires 'POSIX::strptime';
 
 requires 'List::Util';
 requires 'List::MoreUtils';
@@ -143,3 +144,6 @@ requires 'List::Gather';
 requires 'Lingua::EN::Inflexion';
 requires 'local::lib';
 requires 'Array::Utils';
+requires 'DBD::SQLite';
+requires 'Mojo::SQLite';
+requires 'FFI::Platypus';
diff --git a/var/factoid.lst b/var/factoid.lst
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c6b6458
--- /dev/null
+++ b/var/factoid.lst
@@ -0,0 +1,140 @@
+freenode.net#NULL-q
+freenode.net#perlbot-q
+-q
+//
+/o
+PerlIO
+Unicode
+__DATA__
+cgi
+fat comma
+foreach
+heredoc
+learn perlbot
+manual
+objects
+perl regex
+perl5004delta
+perl5005delta
+perl561delta
+perl56delta
+perl570delta
+perlaix
+perlamiga
+perlapi
+perlapio
+perlapollo
+perlbeos
+perlbook
+perlboot
+perlbs2000
+perlcall
+perlce
+perlcheat
+perlcn
+perlcompile
+perlcygwin
+perldata
+perldbmfilter
+perldebguts
+perldebtut
+perldebug
+perldelta
+perldgux
+perldiag
+perldos
+perldsc
+perlebcdic
+perlembed
+perlepoc
+perlfaq
+perlfaq1
+perlfaq2
+perlfaq3
+perlfaq4
+perlfaq5
+perlfaq6
+perlfaq7
+perlfaq8
+perlfaq9
+perlfilter
+perlfork
+perlfreebsd
+perlfunc
+perlguts
+perlhack
+perlhist
+perlhpux
+perlhurd
+perlintern
+perlintro
+perliol
+perlipc
+perlirix
+perljp
+perlko
+perllexwarn
+perllocale
+perllol
+perlmachten
+perlmacos
+perlmint
+perlmod
+perlmodinstall
+perlmodlib
+perlmodstyle
+perlmpeix
+perlnetware
+perlnewmod
+perlnumber
+perlobj
+perlop
+perlopentut
+perlos2
+perlos390
+perlothrtut
+perlpacktut
+perlplan9
+perlpod
+perlpodspec
+perlqnx
+perlre
+perlref
+perlreftut
+perlrequick
+perlretut
+perlrun
+perlsec
+perlsolaris
+perlstyle
+perlsub
+perlsyn
+perlthrtut
+perltie
+perltoc
+perltodo
+perltooc
+perltoot
+perltrap
+perltru64
+perltw
+perlunicode
+perlunifaq
+perluniintro
+perlunitut
+perlutil
+perluts
+perlvar
+perlvmesa
+perlvms
+perlvos
+perlwin32
+perlxs
+perlxstut
+pod
+posix
+quotes
+setuid
+sprintf
+strict
+use warnings
diff --git a/var/factoid2.lst b/var/factoid2.lst
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6ca41c2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/var/factoid2.lst
@@ -0,0 +1,138 @@
+-q =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+// =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+/o =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+PerlIO =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+Unicode =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+__DATA__ =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+cgi =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+fat comma =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+foreach =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+heredoc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+learn perlbot =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+manual =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+objects =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perl regex =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perl5004delta =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perl5005delta =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perl561delta =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perl56delta =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perl570delta =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlaix =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlamiga =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlapi =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlapio =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlapollo =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlbeos =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlbook =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlboot =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlbs2000 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlcall =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlce =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlcheat =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlcn =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlcompile =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlcygwin =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldata =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldbmfilter =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldebguts =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldebtut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldebug =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldelta =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldgux =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldiag =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldos =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perldsc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlebcdic =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlembed =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlepoc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq1 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq2 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq3 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq4 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq5 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq6 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq7 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq8 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfaq9 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfilter =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfork =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfreebsd =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlfunc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlguts =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlhack =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlhist =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlhpux =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlhurd =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlintern =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlintro =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perliol =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlipc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlirix =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perljp =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlko =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perllexwarn =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perllocale =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perllol =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmachten =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmacos =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmint =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmod =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmodinstall =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmodlib =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmodstyle =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlmpeix =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlnetware =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlnewmod =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlnumber =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlobj =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlop =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlopentut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlos2 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlos390 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlothrtut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlpacktut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlplan9 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlpod =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlpodspec =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlqnx =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlre =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlref =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlreftut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlrequick =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlretut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlrun =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlsec =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlsolaris =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlstyle =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlsub =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlsyn =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlthrtut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltie =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltoc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltodo =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltooc =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltoot =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltrap =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltru64 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perltw =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlunicode =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlunifaq =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perluniintro =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlunitut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlutil =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perluts =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlvar =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlvmesa =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlvms =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlvos =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlwin32 =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlxs =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+perlxstut =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+pod =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+posix =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+quotes =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+setuid =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+sprintf =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+strict =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g
+use warnings =~ s{https?://perldoc\.perl\.org/([^/]+).html}{https://perldoc.pl/$1}g